Her jacket was the kind that brushed up against itself.
Her face a moving picture of a middle-aged woman when she was young.
Her hair, smoke from decades ago.

He was caught in a stereotype.
Tall, asian, awkward.
They held hands, embraced.
I left at Yonge and Bloor.

Dear Ana,

I glanced at you from across the hallway today. I wished you didn't notice, but thinking back I hope you did. I thought you were pretty but awkward standing there. You usually take up more space than you need to.


Dear Ana,

You asked me a stupid question today. At least my answer was better than your question, but I still couldn't shoot you down. Just know that I really wanted to. It's not like I should treat you any differently.


Dear Ana,

I went on a date tonight. It sucked. She was boring and shallow and annoying and I could still hear her chewing as I escaped to the bathroom. She had nice tits though, so I fooled around with her for a bit in the car. But she couldn't kiss for shit and she gave a sloppy handjob, so even that wasn't worth my time. I drove her home, but I couldn't fake a goodnight kiss. Or even a goodbye kiss. If I see her tomorrow I'll just ignore her until she gets too in my face and I rant and put her in her place. Hopefully you see me do that.


Dear Ana,

You are unnecessary and in abundance. Kindly get out of my life.


Dear Ana,

Remember that day when for once the music room was empty? I was taking full advantage when you had to come in and destroy my solitude. But you didn't say anything and just hummed. I hope you made all that up. I always remember it like you did. And I haven't heard anything like it since. For a normally incompetent waste of space you were truly magic for those moments.


Dear Ana,

I never have time for myself anymore. I've become so soft and seem to always be around people I hate. But I'm never around you. Maybe I've changed.


Dear Ana,

Where the hell did you go? People say you switched schools but you'd be more likely to off yourself in the most pathetic place possible. Good riddance and no luck to you. I always hated how you'd never glance back or retort to my perfect pejoratives. Good fucking riddance, I hope you splattered over 50 cars with your massive fucking body. I fucking hate you Ana and don't you dare haunt me.

Goddamned sincerely,

Well "I want to see you" will become abstracted eventually.
The Heaviness you take for granted, it turns out it needs feeding.
The beast grows restless although his food has good intentions.
Stupid thing. Hunt. Why wait for what you know isn't coming?

But you are an ancient creature. Ancient, wise yet incredibly stupid.
You leave your wisdom to rot, and worse, also your heart.
You lead a beautiful kingdom, but it's in past and surreal.
The real is dead, Skeleton King. Creature of the night.

Leave this graveyard that used to helm your throne.
Your people need guidance.

_tsk

He walked into an empty room.
Well, he walked into his empty room.
And it was empty because he just cleaned it.
Cleaned it calmly and meticulously, removing every item as if it were an equal unit.
Like those stupid wooden cubes he played with in Grade Two.
All the same.

He walked into that empty room and didn't see cleanliness, so he brought back some cubes.
He started to place them in a pattern along the edge of the room.
That wasn't enough.
So he stacked thousands against one corner.
It was a perverted pyramid.
It wasn't enough.
More and more he brought in.
He added to patterns, he created symmetry or created the oblong.
Bit by bit he added to try and make it perfect, but it wasn't enough.
It was all the same: just not enough.

And no matter how many times he left and came back to his room to add or remove blocks nothing changed.
It was just off enough for him to never be satisfied.

But he kept his bed of blocks so he could sleep.
So he did sleep.
But always slightly below the surface.



Moral of the story kids: ________________________________________________________

This will be on your test.

_tsk

And in the darkness,
all is calm,
and all is calm,
and he is seething.

Take deeper breaths,
also quicker
and also quicker
he starts to feel.

Like shadow fingers,
now on your arm
and on your arm
he turns to ice.

So silent scream,
into the darkness
and in the darkness
nothing falls.

_tsk